that's who i am...

our hope endures

2009-06-19T17:36:00.000-07:00

You would think only so much can go wrong
Calamity only strikes once
And you assume that this one has suffered her share
Life will be kinder from here

Sometimes the sun stays hidden for years
Sometimes the sky rains night after night
When will it clear
But our hope endures
the worst of conditions
It's more than our optimism
Let the earth quake
Our hope is unchanged

How do we comprehend peace within pain
Our joy at a good man's wake
Walk a mile with a woman whose body is torn
With illness but she marches on

Sometimes the sun stays hidden for years
Sometimes the sky rains night after night
When will it clear
But our hope endures
the worst of conditions
It's more than our optimism
Let the earth quake
Our hope is unchanged
Emanuel, God is with us
El Shaddai, all sufficient

We never walk alone
This is our hope
Our hope endures, the worst of conditions
It's more than our optimism
let the earth quake
Our hope is unchanged

Gods love

2009-03-31T08:24:00.000-07:00

I dont even know where to begin. First of all, i feel so lucky and so blessed to be loved by the God of the nations. the God who put earth in to place, who created the beautiful sunsets and the wonderous snow storms. the God who put the power into the waves of the oceans, and the calm into the cool spring breezes. the God who alligned the stars and knows exactly how many are in the vastness of space. the God who commands the storms and the God who orchestrates the very lives that we live. the God who presents us with the greatest gift of all. salvation. and the forgivness of sins through the blood shed on the cross by his One and only son. the Son who experienced the weight of all human depravity and sin in that moment on Calvary and took the punsishment of our filthy hearts. the God who knows us each by name and knows us better than we know ourselves.
i love how Psalm 139 says it"
1 O LORD, you have searched me and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.
4 Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD.
5 You hem me in—behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.
7 Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, [a] you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,"
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.
13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
16 your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them!"

God knows each and everyone of us and loves each of us the same. He has time for all of our petty worries, our cries, our petitions. We are important to him, not because He needs us, for He is God and He is Holy, He is Glory, He is I AM, yet he takes time to love us and know us. What an amazing love that is!!! I want to know it more and more everyday. i want to take time and cultivate my love with my Savior. I want to forget about my own desires, my own wants, i want to forget about mine mine mine. and give it all to Him. I want HIM to be first and foremost in my life. to be my one desire. I want my heart to be a place that is welcoming to Him, not a place full of the filth of this world. but a place that is pure and worthy of our King. I will never attain any of that to its fullest, because i am fallen. we are all fallen. but with his help we can grow each day. we can become more and more like Him. We are called to be imitators of Christ. Ephesians 5:1,2 "Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." ...what a high calling. I want to live a life of love. I want people to see Jesus in me. I want to live in the power He has sent us out with. The power that raised Jesus from the dead on the 3rd day. The power that healed the blind, the paralyzed, the broken hearts...the power that walked on water, that fed the 5000. I dont want to be lazy and live a wasted life.

I long for the day when i will be made complete in Him. the day when i meet him face to face. my Jesus. who holds my heart.

I love the song by Mercy Me ~ Finally Home
" I'm gonna wrap my arms around my daddy's neck and tell him that I've missed him.
and tell him all about the man that i became and hope that it pleased him. there's so much i want to say. there's so much i want you to know
When i finally make it home. when i finally make it home.
Then I'll gaze upon the throne of the King frozen in my steps
and all the questions that i swore i would ask, words just won't come yet.
so amazed at what I've seen, so much more than this old mind can hold.
And the sweetest sound my ears have yet to hear voices on angels."

When we have finished the fight here. when we have told all we know of His undying, forever faithful love, when He sees fit to bring us home. that is when we will truly know God's love. when we are with Him. complete. made whole. until then I want to learn more of this love. and in this unperfect world i want other to know Gods perfect love. I pray He would use me in this.

sunshine and suntans.

2009-03-23T11:40:00.001-07:00

well lets just say welcome to spring!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love it
and welcome to allergies!!!!!!!!!! boo, i do NOT love it.
got to figure something out bc with this nice weather i am planning on being outside ALL the time. at least anytime i am not at work.

the sun is out, there is a refreshing breeze, flowers are starting to bloom.

its time for reading at the pool, biking at umstead, pick up soccer, laying out, etc, etc.
oh and i will be at the beach majority of my open weekends. (thats my goal anyway)

im so thankful that we have seasons here in NC. however i wouldnt mind less freezing cold days and less humidity:) humidity and i are NOT friends. i think i would be an angry person without air conditioners. G, you saw me the 1st day in St John(i got over it, that place is AMAZING, i would go back tomorrow). BUt if bathing suits and tank tops were appropriate attire, then i would be at complete peace with humidity:)

this spring/summer i have goals:
1. get my bike fixed up so i can start cycling outside. cycling is my new hobby, but ive only taken classes indoors. i think umdstead would be great to check out
2. spend time at parks (umstead, fletcher park) playing soccer, throwing the football, biking, hiking, playing ultimate frisbee, etc. i love the outdoors and i love being active.
3. get to the beach A LOT!
4. eat delicious seafood each time i make it to the beach. love me some scallops or shrimp and grits:)
5. drink sweet tea with some great music on and windows down in my car.
6. GET A TAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love tans, they make me happy. i really want a flip flop tan, those are the best.
7. play on the playground at topsail, for tradition (G remember the cactus.AH)
8. PRACTICE SURFING . i can get up on a short board, but not a long board. i think its too heavy for me to get going and catch the wave.
9. get over my fear of jellyfish. thanks to that one back in highschool, i am terribly afraid.
10. walk to the pier and back at topsail.
11. spend a couple days in downtown wilmington shopping and eating, what a great combo
12. IGA. i will be there a lot.
13. hit up the dairy queen at topsail. thank goodness for blizzards. delish. chocolate with resees cups
14.i really want to go to the dockside in calabash again and get the amazing grouper special.
15. why do so many of these involve food?! :)
16. make an awesome mix cd for the summer, ya know some chill acoustic stuff...
17. go to all the amazing country concerts: Kenny Chesney, Lady Antebellum, Keith Urban, Sugarland
18. myrtle beach road trip with alicia.while there go to a good concert at house of blues.
19. wear my quicksilver surf shirt, yes that is where my nickname Blue Crush came from, man i have a long ways to go to live up to that standard!
20. wear sunscreen. sorry folks, this is a new concept to me. i just started some last year. but i want to take care of my skin...prevent cancer for as long as possible. yikes!
21. i would really like to find a fun new beach towel. preferably the HUGE kind. like for two people, no, there is no one to lay on it. dont worry you would know about it. :) haha. but i like to spread out. ya know, gotta have room for the ipod, my huge water bottle, my book, tanning oil, i mean sunscreen;)
22. go to charelston, again. love it!
23.tubing on the lake
24. or just get to ride around in a boat. that could be my home.
25. learn how to shag. maybe even salsa dance:)
26. this is a good place to stop.
27. im open to suggestions

love yall and love sunny warm weather
happy monday:)

This just about sums it up...

2009-02-26T13:19:00.000-08:00

I need clarity and truth to be
And peace to make me whole
I want freedom to come and hate to be done
And love to guide my soul
I want love, yeah, I want love

Standing on the battle line
I fight for my mind aching to be free
This war that I face as I long to embrace
And be with my King

And this fire in my soul, desire to be whole
Is deep within my bones
And I long to be near as I cast away my fear
Running for your throne

I need clarity and truth to be
And peace to make me whole
I want freedom to come and hate to be done
And love to guide my soul

Yeah, I want love, I want loveI want love, I want love
Yeah, I wantI want
I want clarity and truth to be
And peace to make me whole
I want freedom to come and hate to be done
And love to guide my soul
Yeah, I want love, yeah, I want love
Yeah, I want love, yeah, I want love
Yeah, I want love, yeah, I want love
Yeah, I want love, yeah, I want love

I want
I don't know
I don't know

Hot Tea

2009-02-18T13:14:00.000-08:00

is a new favorite drink of mine. i am just beginning to enjoy it:)

today is rainnnnnnnnyyyyyyyyyyy. i am sure that we need it. its one of those rainy days where you could stay in bed all afternoon and read, nap, read, nap, eat, read, nap, watch dvr, journal, journal, journal....

ya know, one of those...

however, that is not reality and one must go to work.

so in order to get myself going, and warm, i am currently drinking English Breakfast Black Tea.

English Breakfast tea is a black tea blend usually described as full-bodied, robust, and/or rich, and blended to go well with milk and sugar, in a style traditionally associated with a hearty English breakfast. It is the most common style of tea in Britain.
The black teas included in the blend vary, with Assam, Ceylon and Kenyan teas predominating, and Keemun included in more expensive blends. Common brands of English Breakfast tea (which do not always include the term itself in the branding) include Ty·phoo, PG Tips, Twinings, Tetley, Taylors of Harrogate, and Dilmah, as well as many own brands.

another one of my favorites is Earl Grey Tea
Earl Grey tea is a tea blend with a distinctive flavour and aroma derived from the addition of oil extracted from the rind of the bergamot orange, a fragrant citrus fruit.

i will have to say that i like this better than the breakfast tea. it is less bitter and has a tiny bit of sweet to it. i guess that is the hint of bergamont orange found in this tea.

well i will keep you posted on new favorite flavors. i want to try lady grey next.

stay dry!!

My prayer

2009-02-12T11:42:00.000-08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X-afZJ9_TIM

Twinkies

2009-02-06T12:10:00.000-08:00

are not my favorite food. and i really dont like them ...at all!

but who would have thought there were so many recipes for desserts using twinkies?!?

only in America huh?

take a look at all of these (I find it quite amusing and a lil bit nauseating):

Chocolate Twinkie Smasher-Items Needed:
3 Hostess Twinkies
6 scoops of chocolate ice cream
6 chocolate cookies
DIRECTIONS: First, you must smash the Twinkies and chocolate cookies in a bowl. Next, scoop the ice cream into the bowl. Then, mix it all together. Voila!! The best thing about this recipe is that it is fun for kids or adults to make!!

Layered Twinkie Delight -Items Needed:
Hostess Twinkie
Scoop of ice cream
Carmel topping
Chopped pecans
DIRECTIONS: Cut Twinkie in half (lengthwise) to create bottom layer. Add a scoop of ice cream. Smother with caramel topping. Sprinkle with chopped pecans. Repeat steps 1-4. Top with a dollop of whipped topping. (Oh, and don't forget the cherry)

No really, there are more than 2..this is just a taste of all you can creat with twinkies..

for more go to...

http://www.hostesscakes.com/recipe_list.htm

ya'll can thank me later for this post;)

His words

2009-01-27T12:29:00.000-08:00

are living. they are at work in our lives. in our hearts. Im so thankful for the times that I hear God speaking to me, personally, through his word. when those times are hard to find, i miss them!! and i long for them. i get frustrated and give up. not what i should so . but sometimes i am stubborn and lazy.

I never want to forget the awesomeness of God. i want to be in AWE of him daily. and never take for granted what HE has done for me ..for all of us. what a priceless gift.

but like i said. when we soften our hearts, we hear him speaking to us in that still small place. i find that its only when i can actually quiet my heart and my mind that i am able to hear my Father. in the ways that he desires me to hear him. this world makes it hard to be quiet. but that doesnt mean its an excuse. we are called to God first. we must create those times. and not become lazy and stubborn.

I was reading last week and God spoke very loudly to me. i had opened to Jeremiah chapter 33. I knew in that moment it was him encouraging me to keep looking for his voice. and I did. what a sweet time. how he blesses us when we obey and we long for him.
It was the first time and place in a while i strongly felt his voice so i have decided to go through the book of Jeremiah since that is where i heard him calling me....

im amazed. i know he has me here for a reason. as i am asking for guidance on if He would have me go to China. im excited. my heart wants to be there. with those i dont know. but yet they are still family. with them to reach others for the Gospel of Jesus Christ. what could be more fulfilling and exciting. its what we are made for

Today was just the beginning of my journey through Jeremiah. but i know that daily God will meet with me there as his words come to life in my heart
im ready. and im eager. i pray i will be faithful with what he teaches me

Jeremiah 33:2 "This is what the LORD says, he who made the earth, the LORD who formed it and established it—the LORD is his name: 3 'Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.'

SNOW!!

2009-01-20T13:29:00.000-08:00

has finally come to Raleigh! usually its the freezing rain and icy roads we get. never the soft white snow.

i went to bed dreaming about it. and i woke to reality. looking out the window...white was all i could see. the trees, roads, houses, and cars. all covered in a sheet of snow, 6 inches of snow

its so peaceful, so serene...

its the perfect day for reading and movies and sitting by the fireplace with hot cocoa..yes cheesy cliche, but i did it. and loved it.

its the perfect day to have chili for lunch and to take a nap because you can.

its the perfect day to go sledding or tubing with your with you friends.
snowball fights, snow angels.
snow cream

im thankful for the snow today. and im thankful that our Creator gave us such a winter wonderland.
im thankful for the time to relax and have time to myself.

but when this is gone. ill be ready for warm weather, flip flops, tan lines, seafood at Sears Landing. walks in the sand. and fun dresses

Cruise Control and a Birthday

2009-01-12T10:34:00.000-08:00

Both played a very important role during this past weekend. Yes I drove to visit Ginny for her Birthday. You wouldnt believe it, but i made it there in 2.5 hrs. and i made it home in 1 hr and 45 minutes. I like to thank cruise control for that. and i would also like to thank people for deciding not to clog up the highways during the time i was road tripping. I had a pretty easy drive and majority of the time the left lane was open for me. i would also like to thank all police men/women for not hiding out on the ramps and medians..ya know, just in case i may have been speeding. i highly doubt it though:-0

well to start off friday night i went to cycling with jenn right after work. needless to say, it was amazing even though i got my butt kicked. i changed and left straight from the gym. i had packed a banana because i knew my body would pass out if i did not feed it right after cycle. arriving at the wonderful condo was great. Ginny and i spent friday night relaxing. i find it funny, but not sad. that fridays tend to be a great night to relax. very contrary to a couple years ago. well we chatted and decided off to bed was the best choice. and saturday came quickly.

saturday morning was productive. we did inventory on Ginny's entire closet. very productive as we ended up with two huge garbage bags full. dontating is wonderful! i love hand me downs. well saturday afternoon was full of errands. lunch was at McAlisters. I would nominate them for best sweet tea anyday! old navy and dicks sporting goods were great to us. not so great to the bank account however. sat night was hanging out and watchin the panthers game at Michael and Jos house. we had chips with 3 amazing dips. then home made fish tacos for dinner. delish! the night was full of cheering, groaning, arms being thrown in the air. and Eli. yes Eli is there 2.5 year old son. i would like to have one of him one day!! he is adorable. so cute. he showed off his football skills. he begged his mommie to watch Arsenal (for those who dont know, that is a soccer team. i love that a 2 year old knew of them!!) he also wanted to watch cars or cinderella, depending on what minute you asked him.
Sunday was church, lunch with friends. we ate the brunch buffet at a pizza place. yes the buffet had omelets, fruit, belgian waffles, and pizza. the waffles were AMAZING. the afternoon was chill. ginny and i contemplated life. past present and future. we watched The Holiday with Cameron Diaz and Jude Law..LOVE IT! then i got home at 10 pm. like i mentioned before. thanks cruise control.

I loved this past weekend.. for many reasons: I love Ginny, i love her birthday, i now love charlotte friends, i love shomars, i love matthews-mint hill road. yes it is one of my favorite roads. Charlotte was a great time! it was so wonderful that i briefly considered moving there. uh huh, for a short period of time i actually thought about it.

Time to Shine in '09 ~ Tay

2009-01-07T08:05:00.000-08:00

WOW, i cant believe its the beginning of a new year. and the last year of this decade. time flies!! Next New years eve there will be no option to wear the glasses that say "2009" with the holes in the zeros being the eyeholes..yea, wont work for "2010" . its the small things in life. come one now.

Wellllllllllll as Tay says, its time to shine is '09! i love that. i hope to be the light God would have me to be in this broken world. i hope to shine in a way that is worthy of the name of Jesus Christ. I dont want to be mediocre in my pursuit of this heavenly Savior that wants to know me. I desire to know him. that is what i want for 2009.

I also want to travel. to Switzerland that is, to visit my dear friend Maria.
I want to travel with Ginny to pheonix or to St John.
I will be traveling to Kentucky to be a bridesmaid in Kristin Line's wedding. ive never been to KY..AND they are picking me up in Nashville, TN..sooooooo i cant wait to hang out there too:-)

other than that. i think this year will be exciting. not sure what is to come. but i find that exciting in itself.

all i know is that its back to day one. back to work, back to freezing cold winter weather. back to hoping its warm enough for the beach...its 2 weeks til Trey is 4 months old. and its 2 months from my birthday.

I hope everyone's 2009 is off to a fabulous start!!
the end!

My Scarf

2008-12-23T08:41:00.000-08:00

The temperature today is FREEZING. and so it should be on the eve of Christmas Eve. I do not love the cold, but i do find it necessary during Christmas time! the 70 degree weather this past week felt amazing,but come on, its December, i should not be able to lay out in December. However, if anyone knows me, i will lay out any chance i get! Thanks you Kenny for the song, All I Want for Christmas is a Real Good Tan. im am so seconding that right now. i am not a fan of this pastiness that is taking over. ah

Well i kind of went off on a tangent.
I was saying how cold it is today just to say that because of the coldness I am wearing a scarf! i love scarfs, this is one of the first ones i got. my brothers ex gf made one for my mom and I. (Its ok they dated back in highschool, but check her out on myspace, beautiful voice. www.myspace.com/lydiagray ) this scarf is not the typical cotton or silk kind. its woven with this crazy shag material. It consists of my favorite colors. Green, turquoise, and royal blue. Scarfs are great. They are practical as well as fashionable. so guys, do not always say that girls only get accessories for fashion. this scarf is actually quite practical on a day like this eve of Christmas Eve. Its keeping me warm! and if it looks nice, then thats icing on the cake.

ok random facts about the scarf:
1. i have had it for 9 years. wow i find it crazy that time goes by that quickly.
2. again, i love the colors: green, royal blue, turquoise.
3. its very warm
4. i have worn it a lot this winter
5. it is proof that Christmas gifts that someone makes for you are not always lame!
6. it smells like baby spit up. ( I know that is gross, but its only in one spot. you cannot wash this material. i didnt notice it until i got to work, so i will have to find the spot and hand wash it soon. but in the mean time i will be reminded of my nephew trey all day. the spit up is thanks to him! and actually i do not need help being reminded of him. he is my best friend, no for real, he is)
7. i cannot wear this scarf with orange, red, or pink.
8. it goes best with blue, green, black, white, and maybe brown could work
9. i have another one in this material that is all white.
10. my hair gets knotted at my neck where the scarf is.
11. that is annoying
12. but at least my neck is not cold.
13. i do not know how to make a scarf
14. or matching gloves or mittens or hats

alright well that is all i got. and 14 might have been stretching it, but i am ok with that

Merry eve of Christmas Eve to all!!!
and i hope you get a scarf for Christmas

I Am Second

2008-12-09T11:57:00.000-08:00

http://www.iamsecond.com/

these stories are awesome

Catching up

2008-12-04T06:30:00.000-08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O2o1uxzI-hA

1. This song is amazing. it made me cry. for several reasons. i love crying. not the sad kind, but the kind that you cant keep away. the kind that comes from your soul.
listen to that song please. and especially the lyrics. its amazing. our Lord, King, Savior is amazing. and his ways our not our ways. I hope i learn more about that!

2. So 2008 is ending. WOW has it been a year to remember. More has happened in this year than ever, i feel like i say that every year. ha. but i wouldnt change any of it. God has been so gracious to me. I want to know him more, and honor him more. I want to shine of his love more in this dark place. I want to remember that this is not my home.. i want that to resonate in my heart, not just my mind. I dont want to get comfortable here or feel cozy. We are only passing through. I want to be constantly looking toward the day that we do go home, and do everything in sight of that.

3.Well my nephew is perfect. yes he was born on Sept 19th. its probably now in my top 5 favorite days of my life. its true. i love him to death. HE is the most precious picture of innocence and purity. When his lip curls and he gets sad. its the most real sadness. he doenst know how to fake being sad for attention yet. his face looks as if he is trying his best to be happy, but that lip still wins and curls. its pitiful. your probably like, why the heck is this kid so sad. well its because sometime his stomach bothers him. a baby changes everything.

4.WE got to celebrate his first thanksgiving not long ago..how special. all my aunts, uncles, cousins were there. we ate til we fell back on the couches, we watched all the good football games, we talked about life, the Lord, and the love that he has blessed our family with..im so thankful, its not like that everywhere.

5. Soccer season has a break. Its nice. to have time after work for the gym again. Um there is this one instructor. Jenn. she is amazing. i dont know how she does it. Alicia, you know what im talkign about. But i love her classes. Cycling is awesome and i just started her sculpting. i think i might die after every class..but i love it. kinda like how i love roller coasters and scary movies. ya know.haha
back to soccer, our season starts back up again in january with our first season game being february 7th. man that is gonna be here soon. and we will freeze at practice. i love those girls. they are blessing. i love this opportunity. i want to help them be a better team. i hope they will have more mental discipline this year, and more fight in them. thats the only way i know. i also hope to show them JEsus. I want them to know its cool to love him and follow him at all ages. and during their time in 6th grade.

6. Its 3 weeks til CHristmas. I love this time of year. We always have a birthday cake for Jesus. its great. a baby changes everything, its true. Its going to be super busy til then, 3 Christmas parties, 2 concerts, a girls night tonight which i am SUPER pumped about.
our christmas tree is up at my parents' house. its great. alicia and i are decorating our townhome this saturday. it will be a fun roommie bonding day.

7.so with this last month of the year now upon us. i want to cherish each day. i want to live each moment in the moment on not looking for anything more or wishing for something. i want to be thankful for where God has me, what he is teaching me and showing me this day. Because life and breath is too precious to miss out on. Soon it will be 2009. i think it will be a great year. my heart is excited. i dont really know why. but it is. and i like that

Give Me Your Eyes - Brandon Heath

2008-10-03T13:55:00.000-07:00

This song is so IT. I pray this would be the desire of our generation!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hGr8as7pPBE&feature=related

Look down from a broken sky
Traced out by the city lights
My world from a mile high
Best seat in the house tonight
Touch down on the cold black top
Hold on for the sudden stop
Breathe in the familiar shock
Of confusion and chaos
All those people going somewhere
Why have I never cared
Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me your love for humanity
Give me your arms for the broken-hearted
The ones that are far beyond my reach
Give me your heart for the ones forgotten
Give me your eyes so I can see
Step out on a busy street
See a girl and our eyes meet
Does her best to smile at me
To hide what's underneath
There's a man just to her right
Black suit and a bright red tie
Too ashamed to tell his wife
He's out of work, he's buying time
All those people going somewhere
Why have I never cared
Chorus
I've been here a million times
A couple of million eyes
Just move and pass me by
I swear I never thought that I was wrong
Well, I want a second glance
So give me a second chance
To see the way You've seen the people all along

I was tagged so here i go!

2008-10-03T05:56:00.000-07:00

1. What time did you get up this morning?
7:15 am
2. Diamonds or pearls?
i like both but for the most part i prefer diamonds:-)
3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema?
The Dark Knight
4. What is your favorite TV show?
um i have a few, LOST, the Office, Privelged (its my newest addition to DVR)
5. What do you usually have for breakfast?
plain oatmeal with bananas and chocolate chips
6. What is your middle name?
Shae
7. What food do you dislike?
brussel sprouts
8. What is your favorite CD at moment?
i have a mix CD at work that i enjoy. it includes: john mayer, jason mraz, maroon 5, tonic, gavin degraw..I also love my shane and shane CDs, always!
9. What kind of car do you drive?
Lexus
10. Favorite sandwich?
if i could only eat one sandwich for the rest of my life it would be turkey on wheat with lettuce, tomato, honey mustard, provolone cheese.
11. What characteristic do you despise?
when people try to hard..just relax and be yourself. I also do not like people who are fake. I guess thats the same! haha
12. Favorite item of clothing?
A good pair of jeans!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and always my rainbows, tan, black, or ivory..haha

13. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go?
I’m really itching to get to Europe right now! me too lauren!
14. Favorite brand of clothing?
i love banana republic, express for dress pants, nordstrom and belk..that didnt answer the question.sorry
15. Where would you retire to?
Who knows if I’ll retire! That’s a long way off. but i do like raleigh..close to the beach and the mountains..haha..i need to travel more though before i decide. and who knows what ill think when im old..
16. What was your most recent memorable birthday?
well most recent was my 26th..my bestests came to town and surprised me!! cheesecake factory. but the overall most memorable was my 20th!! i had a pinata. and got sang to on the bar by all the KA pledges..um yes it was interesting!! that was a longggggggggg time ago!
17. Favorite sport to watch?
I like college football, nfl too. i love watching soccer. oh and olympics!!!!!! track, gymnastics, swimming

18. When is your birthday?
Feb 27th

19. Are you a morning person or a night person?
um id say mornings now.i used to be nocturnal
20. What is your shoe size?
7.5 or 8..yes big for my height..dr.s said i was gonna be 5' 6" ..hmmm
21. Pets?dog , Cody,..he's a german short haired pointer..AMAZING

22. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with us?
id have to agree with lauren..im super thnkful of how the Lord saves me everyday, how He blesses me, and loves me. but im an aunt now!! thats exciting news
23. What did you want to be when you were little?
i wanted to be a soccer player.h.aha
24. How are you today?
wonderful..life is grand. ive got all i ever need! Jesus, family, friends, a house, a job, a dog, food, clothes, etc etc..
25. What is your favorite candy(lollie/chocolate)?
dark chocolate
26. What is your favorite flower?
dont know, gerbera daisies i think
27. What is a day on the calendar you are looking forward to?
thanksgiving, nov 8th..morgans wedding..its gonna be a blast!
28. What is your full name?
Kristin Shae Beacham

29. What are you listening to right now?
a mix CD that was a favor from my friend emily's wedding last weekend...its great..beach music, shag music, real chill ..Lovin In My Babies Eyes..great song!!
30. What was the last thing you ate?
ugh...i never do this..i had a jr cheeseburger from wendys..reason being this: i took my car to get inspected and i could walk to the wendys for lunch..but incase you are wondering,the next thing i will drink is a mocha from stonewold
31. Do you wish on stars?
not really..but God made them and that is amazing..i do like to lay outside on a nice night free of mosquitos and look at them:-)
32. If you were a crayon, what color would you be?
GREEN!!! my favorite color
33. How is the weather right now?
AMAZING!!!!!!!!!! i love the fall..its cool, not cold, refreshing, not humid, and its sunny:-)
34. The first person you spoke to on the phone today?
Hmmm i talked to Ginny's voicemail..next was work stuff:-(
35. Favorite soft drink?
Mountain Dew..but i prefer sweet tea from cloos!!

36. Favorite restaurant?
HMM i love Cafe Luna, Maggianos, Sear's Landing at Topsail, ...
37. Real hair color?
umm dirty blonde?!?
38. What was your favorite toy as a child?
the tree in our front yard.also my bike and the creek. i loved my soccer ball too
39. Summer or winter?
I do not like extreme weather. i love fall and spring!!
40. Hugs or kisses?
righ now def hugs!!

41. Chocolate or Vanilla?
CHOCOLATE..i dont even like vanilla ice cream..does that make me wierd?
42. Coffee or tea?
well depends on the type..i actually drink espresso and sweet tea..i dont drink coffee or hot tea much
43. When was the last time you cried?

um last wed night..for someone i love..
44. What is under your bed?
two paintings i havent hung in my house yet

45. What did you do last night?
gym with alicia!! then coffee with a friend... :-)
46. What are you afraid of?
losing my family..

47. Salty or sweet?
sweet!!!

48. How many keys on your key ring?
um house, mail, office, beach house..
49. How many years at your current job?
3
50. Favorite day of the week?
friday night, saturday, sunday..that is 2.25 days
51. How many places have you lived in?
um Nashville, TN; Cary and Raleigh,NC

52. Do you make friends easily?
I think so.ive been told im easy to get along with.

I Tag Tay...

Bon Qui Qui

2008-09-30T11:50:00.000-07:00

this might be one of the funniest things i have ever seen!
please enjoy

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZkdcYlOn5M

Family..Two kinds of Family

2008-09-28T19:04:00.000-07:00

I love my family. I couldnt have a better one in my opinion. I am blessed to have grown up seeing my mom and dad love each other while doing their best to portray Jesus' love in all they do. They are best friends. I hope to have that one day:-) I have two awesome brothers. We have grown very close in the past 8 years..i think its because we are all older and more mature. We have been able to discuss God in our lives, our views, struggles, beliefs, etc etc...
I have the best aunts and uncles too might I add. Ever since i can remember we have gotten together a handful of times each year. Thanksgiving and Christmas are always my favorites. We used to all get together at my Nana's house..there was much food, love, laughter..and lotsssssssssss of kids..which brings me to my cousins. I am the oldest..the youngest is now 16 months old. Well my Nana passed away 6 years ago..i was worried that our family get togethers would become few and far between..but we have kept the same traditions..the only change is we no longer meet at Nana's house. Christmas is usually at my parents' house and Thanksgiving at my Uncle Rick and Aunt Lynda's house..they live at Lake Norman..its nice:-) AND NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! is the newest addition to our family..my first ever nephew!!! i am sooooooo head over heels in love with this precious, tiny, innocent baby boy. My dad made a comment, 'its not very often that you get to see innocence." its so true... Trey, this special baby, is brand new to the world. He is dependent on others for everything, eating, being changed, changing his clothes, giving him a bath..and as he grows older, being taught of Jesus and his love, being taught how to talk and to read and to write, how to feed himself, how to ride a bike, play sports, interact with his friends..and on and on..praying and hoping that as he grows up he doesnt learn his ways from the world, but he learns his ways from the Lord Jesus his Savior..my prayer is and will continue to be that Trey will one day experience God calling him to Himself..and that Trey would respond and obey and confess his need for a Savior allowing Jesus to reign in his heart...Its so special to see a baby grow in the womb and all the way up to 9 months as he then experiences his first breath of air in this new world..its amazing..its a miracle..and its full of joy...Im so thankful for Trey.

And now for my other family..my eternal family, my brothers and sisters in Christ. I have in the past couple of years been SO very blessed with fellow believers that i can experience life with, day by day..we live together..we share struggles, we share praises, we share prayers, we share love, we share the Lord Jesus Christ in our hearts ..and what and AMAZING bond this gives us.. we are united in a supernatural way that only God our Creator could ever instill in people. I am so thankful for these friends. God gives us this family to help us through our visit hear on earth..until the day which we are called home to be with him forever.. all of us in this family of Christ have been given a job, a calling, of the highest honor and responsibility. We are allowed to claim Jesus name..to share him with others..to portray him to others in our actions, words, thoughts, desires..etc etc.. what a high calling, to be the hands and feet of the Lord. How awesome that God would choose to use us and allow us to be used in his works. I pray that we would yield to the Holy Spirit in our hearts. that we would be transformed into people that rightly represent Jesus. that we live TRUTH. we let go of our worldly desires and desire Him and Him alone..that we would stay on the narrow path and live in the abundance he desires for us. I pray that we OBEY our heavenly Father. and that we love him and others the way he first loved us. I want to know our Father better. We are fulfilled by the Lord and him alone. How can we be fulfilled if we dont know him. I want to know him so well that my desires become his own. I want to be a woman of prayer. I want to lose my pride. I want so many things in my heart but I know its only through the strength of my Father that i will be able to live a life worthy of his calling. I hope our generation can see past the decoys and distractions of this world. and that we would see with eyes set on eternity. That we would push everything out of the way and only seek our Fathers face. I hope that the world can see Jesus love through us. I hope and pray that we would rightly love each other..with pure love..not selfish love, not expectant love, not forced love, but with love from a pure heart, love with no alterior motives...i pray that we would learn and know Jesus' love. that we would quit trying to do it on our own.but that we would die to ourselves and let him love the world through us. There is sooooooo much 'other' stuff in me that keeps me from allowing the Lord to work through me to the full potential. wrong ways of thinking, worldly desires,selfish desires, laziness, past sin that only the Lord can redeem, selfishness, pride, impatience, etc etc..but how AWESOME that our Lord cares enough to reveal our sins to us so that we can daily give them to him and allow him to change our heart and minds..every day is the day of salvation, every day he redeems us. And thank goodness for the family of believers he gives us to go through this journey with. We are his soldiers. and we need to be fully armed..our culture has so many vices. but in him, we can change the world...

TayTay...

2008-09-24T13:00:00.000-07:00

Ok so i totally forgot to blog about something in my last blog..which then reminded me of some other stuff i would like to mention!!
yes this blog is dedicated to Taylor and her hilariousness!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
so if you refer to the previous post, the one about hot cocoa( i didnt check the number) well Taylor was there too!! it was a marvelous night..BUT i forgot to mention the funniest part..all of the sudden while we are sitting on the couch Tay puts her mug down and notices she has spilled homemade cocoa ALL over her sweatshirt and pj pants!!! omg..so funny. one, because not only was it like half her mug that was all over her..but two, because she didnt even feel it..so needless to say we had to pause the movie cuz we were laughing so hard..and are lucky no one peed their pants..

a couple other things about tay that that i would like to mention are her 2 hilarious quotes!!
the second of the 2 happened this same weekend while we were at the NCSU football game..on the front row, in the end zone!! it was incredible..well taylor loved it so much..that she says in a very excited tone, "THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFFFFFFFFFFFE!!!!!!!!!" HAHA love it!!
ok now for the first of the two quotes..this one happened at a friend's bachelorette weekend. We were just having the typical girl time and Taylor added to the conversation, "I really dont think I want to share my life with anyone else" WHAT?!?! for real.if you know Tay the way i do..that is the last person i excpected to hear that from!! HAHA..soooo as of right now ..the count on quotes is:
Taylor - 2, the rest of the world - 0.

TAYLOR!!! we love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
xoxo
i get to see you SOON!!!

A Few Things..that is all

2008-09-23T09:00:00.000-07:00

1. Friday my nephew Trey was born. He is 7 lbs 12 oz. 20.5 inches. and PERFECT!! seriously i cant even believe it..its such a miracle. i could just sit and hold him and watch him all day long
2. It is fall..and I LOVEEEEEEEEEE it!! this means pretty leaves, awesome weather, football games, cookouts, the fair, reunions with friends, camping, jeans and sweaters!!!!!!!!:-)
3. Alicia moves in Oct 11th..i am so excited!
4. I love my soccer team. The girls are so adorable and getting more and more excited about soccer. not to mention they have already improved a ton!
5. I start my first acylics painting class today. awesome
6. Friday night is a secret.
7. Sat is WFU game. and Sat night is EM's wedding.. ELON REUNION!!
8. Ive been sick so ive missed working out. Cycling is thursday and i cant wait to get on the Bike
9. Lets back track....Sat was the NCSU game..AMAAAAAAZING and SO fun!! lets just say i lost my voice bc of it. haha..Sat night was Fox and the Hound then out for some dancing, mostly with the girls, but they guys did make an effort. Matt's hair looked good twice in a row..haha.
10. Im excited for about all my new friends
11. I am sad MAria is gone. i will miss her. but im excited to go visit her in Switzerland
12. I want to watch What Happens in Vegas again. GRae, you down?? want to make it 3 times? haha..we could drink that homemade hot cocoa again!!
13. Next week is bbq and shopping spree night.
14. Next week is also the Martina Concert.
15. Last but not least are a few more
16. I love Jesus..i want to love him more and more everyday. that is my hearts desire. He has been truly incredible in my life. so faithful. saved me from situations in my life that i couldnt see the future in. but he knew!! has blessed me with so many amazing friends and family. And even in the tough times He has given me OVERWHELMING joy!! that is soooooooooo worth the obedience that at one time was difficult. God will reign always. He will win the battles..and i strive to daily yield to him
17. I pray for my husband everyday..no no no. i dont know who he is yet. But i cant wait to meet him. and i pray that Jesus reigns as Lord in all areas of his heart and life! We will have lots to talk about one day. i pray its soon
18. Im getting a massage today!
19. im eating 42 st oyster bar for lunch today
20. i wish there were more hours in a day
21. i wish ants could never get into houses!
22. I want someone to invent chapstick that is unbeatable.that works and never stops working!
23. My dad is playing golf today. he is good at everything
24. i love my coworkers..that is a huge blessing!
25. i made homemade choc chip cookies last night
26. tonight i will make choc chip muffins
27. Thurs after cycling i think i will go out to eat sushi
28. I love Sake House
29. I cant wait for Thanksgiving
30. I cant wait for Christmas
31. I dont care for Halloween.
32. I love game nights
33. I love guitar and singing nights
34. I love the Hoods
35. I miss my brother Josh
36. Next year i am traveling around Europe
37. I am also going to Colorodo with a group of friends!!!
38. I will end here..i know 38 is a random place to end..but i ran out of time!

maybe ill continue this randomness later!!

27 Roommates...and more ramblings

2008-09-11T12:10:00.000-07:00

YES i loveeeeeeeeeee the movie 27 dresses..so cute. i could watch is every week if i had time. Oh and i would like to sing Benny and the Jets on a table with James Mardsen!! goodness...
but anyway, this blog is titled 27 Roommates, not dresses...
during college i had the BEST roommates!! that was in 2004..in 2005 i had another great roommate for one year:-) but since then..goodness, it has been a journey. I had one a while back..i swear she tried to poison me..weird for real..i got real sick, both my mom and my hair dresser asked if it was possible that she poisoned me?!?! WHAT?!?! how random. Well since then i have interviewed roommates, had one move in for a month..yea just didnt work out..BUT NOW!!!!!!!!! come oct 11th!!!! it will be pure bliss. a great friend of mine..who i am so happy to have gotten the chance to know, will be moving in, long term!! how wonderful:-) yes we already have it planned out..at least twice a week, cycling then cooking dinner. We love to have get togethers so we will practice our hostess skills. And girls nights, what could be better. God is so good and i know He will continue to grow our friendship on this new journey of roommates...can you tell im excited..we are both psyched..and so is her bf:-) he is welcome too anytime..thats how we roll..

ok and now onto the ramblings. I love mix CDs..i love finding old mix CDs that are marvelous that i had forgotten about!! let me give you the downlow on the one i am listening to now..
Everything by Lifehouse
Moment in Your Arms by some dude..its acoustic and amazing
We Belong Together by Gavin Degraw
Dreams by Gavin Degraw
Demons by Guster
Didnt See it Coming by Guster
She Says by Howie Day
Sugar by Tonic
Shine by ?????
I Miss You by Incubus (A BF from long ago played this on the guitar and sang for me..yes it was nice...thanks)
Vindicated by Dashboard Confessional
Superman by Train
When Red Meet Blue by Matt Wertz
Sweetness in Starlight by Matt Wertz
Track 15 by Unknown Artist
Blinded by Third Eye Blind
How's It Gonna Be by Third Eye Blind
Passenger Seat by Stephen Speaks
When It Comes by Tyler Hilton

so yes im glad i found this CD..when its over i will prob listen to Shane and Shane or Natalie Grant or Nicole Nordeman!!!!!!!! all are favorites..

AND finally...im looking fwd to Saturday...cookout at noon at a friends house for the State game..and then food, fun, friends, guitar, NES, football, sweat tea at night..glorious day.

i actually i could write many more ramblings..but i'll save them for next time...i must get back to work..its 330

oh one more thing..last night at Revolution 714 was amazinggggggggggggggg..God's word is so powerful..
i will try to find the post to the podcast..

lata

PRAISES, ringtones, and the football season

2008-09-04T08:23:00.000-07:00

Im amazed every day at the grace and mercy that is shown to me. I am amazed at how in less than 24 hours God can change my heart and my thoughts to those that will bring more glory to him. He shows me things and allows me do to things that are sooooooooooooo not me..thats why it amazes me.cuz i know its God in me. Kinda crazy but i love it. I pray that i experience this more and more and continue to learn about the divine man that died on the cross for me. And I absolutely cannot wait to meet him!!
With that being said I would love to sing praises to him all day...how great would it be to get some people to play guitar (i cannot) and sit around in the wonderful weather singing whatever songs come to our mind and singing them all to our Savior. those are some of the sweetest times. thanks for musically gifted friends!!

On a whole different note..but still related to music..how about Ginny's new ringback..i still find myself saying ringtone cuz that just sounds better to me..but technically its a ringback..cuz when you call her that is what rings back to you..it goes a lil something like this.."Even thought we ain't got money, Im so in love with ya honeeeyyy.." great song..oldie but goody..
haha who would have thought of the day that when you call someone on the phone you dont hear the typical ring ring but you hear a song..a song of the cell phone owner's choice that is...love it. I dont have a ringback. i used to have a ringtone but my phone was dumb so i got a new one..no new ringtone for me yet..pros and cons. pros for ringtones: you hear them when someone calls you. pros for ringbacks: the person calling you hears a song when they call you and you might pick up and catch them in the middle of singing a very off key note. cons of ringtones: the person calling you just hears the same dull ring ring ring. Cons of ringbacks: you dont get to hear a song when someone calls you.

ok and last but not least is the fact that it is football season!!!! The kickoff game for this college football season was last thursday!! Teran, JJ, Courtney, Me, Mike, Chris, and some other friends all went to Playmakers..man was that place packed out! it was so awesome..everyone was pumped and engergetic. the only negative was the parking..i parked in a half ditch by the railroad track.. it was a great time with friends, food, football. and on the way back to my car, teran and jj (a police man.haha) walked me down the darkened grassy alley beside the rusty old railroad track. i felt more safe. oh and also NCSU lost..the starting quarterback was hurt:-(

This weekend is NCSUs first home game!! im soooo excited! Tay, Ginny and I will be going.we got 3 free tickets and a parking pass..thanks morg!! We will meet up with friends to tailgate then head in to cheer on the pack..oh and we WILL be dressed in our REDS! must support the team colors. I hope the hurricane holds off! if not then i hope the weather sat night still makes for great game weather. Oh how i long to do the NC State fight song again!!! haha Its gonna be great.
So yes you read correct, Tay and Ginny will be here. That makes for an amazing long weekend! the things we must do are go to Cloos, Sushi Blues, the State game, meet up with old friends, and watch Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2, also known as YAYA pants..dont ask..haha . I've heard its not good.but its a must. We saw the first one so we must see this one. Another thing in consideration is a game night! with snacks of course..and maybe some hot cocoa, the homemade kind. Lots of fun things going on.

But in the midst of the fun..God is working in many ways, teaching, challenging, comforting, opening eyes and hearts, taking away pain and fear and anger and bitterness and doubt..and the list goes on. And this is just pure joy, to see him work in the midst of a sinful worldful of sinful people. During this week I have dealt with some hard things that I never expected to occur in my life, but God won. A good friend of mine dealt with a death in her family, but God won. Another amazing man in my life found out he has melanoma, but again God won. A great friend at my church found out her dad has melanmoa but cant get it removed til he has a stint put in his heart, God is winning this battle too. My friend saw a terrible horrific car accident, God won. My friend in Texas is dealing with depression in her friends life, yet again God is winning in this. My brother and his girlfriend have a son together that is to be born Sept 12th and God's amazing love and grace and mercy are taking control in this situation too. Over and over, time and time again, in countless and many diverse ways, ways that we never expect in our lives..God wins these battles in our lives and our hearts. All we have to do is let him fight for us. Thank You Jesus for the hope we have in you!!

Happy weekend as I will not be at work tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!

Aint Life Grand

2008-08-25T08:43:00.000-07:00

God is so good. He is great. I am so thankful for all the blessing he has allowed me to have. thankful for his grace and mercy, his love, and the joy only he can give! I am thankful how he saves me every day..how he saves me from myself and my desires. Only God knows best..I dont know where i would be without that!!

This weekend i coached my U-11 girls challenge soccer team in their first ever tournament, and their first ever 3 games as a team:-) Wow let me tell you about working out the kinks...we lost every game, but we improved each game! The girls were sooooooooo thrilled and excited when they scored their first goal in the last game. We lost 3-1 but it should have been 3-2. we missed a penalty kick. Anyway God's ways are wonderful..I cant really play competitive soccer anymore because of my back..and recently bc of my knee surgery..but God has allowed me to coach for 2 years now! i love it.. my new girls are 10 and 11. They are precious!! so full of smiles and they are so excited for this new journey..a challenge team. more training, more competition, new concepts, new moves, new drills...etc etc. I love being around them..i hope to have a daughter one day..haha..sorry for the tangent. But i also love that i can share Jesus to these girls.. we have a devotional once a week. and i am excited to talk to them more and more about whatever God lays on my heart.
So I had to come up with a team name. I chose ' The United' and the verse / theme for our team is 1 Corinthians 1:10
"I appeal to you, brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another so that there may be no divisions among you and that you may be perfectly united in mind and thought.:
I thought this would be great for the girls especially since we are a brand new team. We can talk about being united as sisters in Christ and how having Jesus in our hearts unites us in mind and thought. Then we can relate it to being on a team, how we must be one body, united, having the same vision.
I look forward to the rest of the season with the girls. I hope to build a close relationship with each of them , teaching them about soccer and Jesus.

on another note small groups are starting back, which i am very excited about!! labor day weekend is coming up and i hope to go to the beach..maybe G and i will go to her dad's house:-)

well back to work..i hope to write more later

Speechless...

2008-08-11T17:57:00.000-07:00

I am speechless for many reasons..

First and most importantly, God is so good..i know this and i have known this but i am still so thankful and amazed at how He saves me everyday!! During times that sound awful or appear awful to the world, He shows me so much love, comfort and peace. Yea times can be difficult or new or uncomfortable..but in the midst of that, covering all of that, surrounding and drowning out all of that is God and his amazing grace and mercies that are new every morning. God asks us and allows us to take refuge in Him, what an amazing gift!!! I have learned that with God, even a 'hard/sad' time is wonderful and full of goodness because HE is the one holding me, guiding me, comforting me, fulfilling me, and smiling on me. IF one thing is true, its that God asks for our obedience always. Even when it may not make sense to us or when we dont want to because it is hard. HE asks us to listen to his voice and respond to the tug he puts on our heart. and when we do this we may be unsure of what is next, but we dont have to fear..God sees beginning and end, and the safest place we can be is in his hands, his will... So as many of you know, i have been making some major life changes. its a new season for me full of growth and stepping out..i believe there is power in change.it makes us trust God more and allows us to grow into that person He has created us to be. He WILL continue the work He has begun in us..how cool is that..all we have to do is love Him, listen to Him, respond when He calls us, and in turn fruit will come from our life, we will experience the power of the Holy Spirit in us and see how HE moves around us, in the hearts of other..We will see a better picture of our Maker as He reveals more and more of himself to us..as He trusts us with more of his truths..Yes his truths, the revelations that only the Holy Spirit can reveal are sacred, they are to be kept safe and respected..we must keep those truths in our heart and in that we must be careful of what we allow in and out of our hearts and mouths.(Proverbs 4).we must be responsible with what God has entrusted to us, we must present ourselves as pure and blameless to the Lord. We are the ones here on earth that are the children of God, we are the soldiers of the Lord, we represent Jesus' name so we must rightly portray Jesus to the world. That is amazing in itself, that God lets us know Him and that He chooses to use us during this life on earth.

ok so i got off track..as you know my thoughts wander..but to make it short. I am once again in awe of my Savior , He is worthy to be praised. More than our sacrifices and our words God desires a broken heart
Psalm 51:17" The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart,
O God, you will not despise"
And what a beautiful place to be. I think these times are when we know its God and only God who sustains us, who wakes us up each morning, and who instills in us his hope, his joy, and his promises...this is so sweet!

I am also in awe of the olympics!! Man..these athletes are amazing. I watched last night when the US beat France in the final leg of the 100m freestyle relay. Talk about heart, intensity, adrenalin. I am in awe of the talents and gifts God has given to his people and how he allows us to enjoy these! The olympic athletes work so hard for 4 years and they are the best. they get one shot to prove themselves worthy to represent their country, to win a metal, to gain the right to have their national anthem played at the medal ceremony. What a sweet time of patriotism for your country. I loved watching the relay team celebrate. Ive never seen such drastic change of emotions in a fraction of a second..the final leg of the relay was approaching the wall as the other teammates cheered him on as he swam to the finish..then silence, eyes that stared holes into the time board across the pool, paralyzed by the anticipation of who touch the sensor first, of who set the world record and who won the gold medal ..and then the times posted..the US beat France. The underdogs in this relay beat the ones expected to win, the US won the gold medal. And after the team processed this...EXPLOSION, there was no containing the emotions, the excitement, the tears of joy, the screaming, the yelling, the jumping, the hugging..like i said i have never seen such contrast of emotions in a split second. I think the US exerted close to as much energy celebrating as they did racing..they deserved it. The French talked smack..the US heard it earlier in the day and did not react..they just said they didnt want to hear it and that all they wanted to do was get the job done in the pool..and so they did, and the gold medal spoke for itself. These talented athletes showed integrity and gained respect even in their actions outside of the pool..it was great. i cant imagine how good that win tasted.

And then another thing..i am in awe of creation..i will make this short. but seriously how amazing is this earth God has created, and all the creatures, plants, etc, etc..i was at the beach last week..this is such a spiritual place for me..away from the city and the business of life...I can see and hear God hear..it is more true to who He is..the ocean is so powerful and only God can control it..but at the same time the ocean is a place of peace and rest..i am thankful for a place to get away and enjoy the sand in my toes, the warmth of the sun, and the sound of the waves...

alright..i could go on..i know you are not surprised
but back to the olympics i go..thank you DVR!

where she stops nobody knows...

2008-07-29T13:41:00.000-07:00

THIS WORLD IS HUGE..and so diverse..
I'm so thankful for my life, my house, my dog, my friends, my family, my job, my health, etc etc..
this is enough, more than enough. God blesses me everyday. I deserve none of it.
BUT i would love to travel more. God's creation is amazing. there are so many countries with awesome landscapes, mountains, beaches, waterfalls,...i want to see it all. I want to visit Italy, Greece, Paris, Spain. I want to learn about the cultures, the people. I think life has gotten way off track for this country. I think we are so caught up in money, things, status, our job title, big houses, expensive cars, fancy things...things we get bored of after a month of owning it. What about the simple things...the trees, the rivers, the birds, the flowers, the sand, the sunset and sunrise, the sound of waves crashing on the shore, the rain, and on and on..and all of these are different all over the world.. God has given us a whole earth to live on. And none of it is the same. That interests me. Ive seen pictures, i've seen movies...but man, to see it all with my own eyes. I would love to ride a train around Europe, by myself or with good friends, or with someone special..i would love to go place to place, taking it all in..sights, sounds, smells, meeting all the different kinds of people, learning about their lives and what they like to do ...i want to know something new, something different from what i have grown up with for 26 years. I love Raleigh, I love NC, I love the US..but there is just so much more. and not much time to experience all of it.
I just dont know how to do it.
But i do know timing is everything.

Pictures- yes like from a camera...

2008-07-21T15:07:00.000-07:00

Hello Everyone.
if you do not know this about me, then you dont know much about me;-) jk

so i rarely take pictures..much less develop them..back in college i only used a disposable camera.that was when i actually took pics...Klein usually gave me doubles..THANKS for that..or I would have no photo albums of my college life..haha

so now Klein is married and in ATL. so i have my own digital camera. however being that the photos are digital, i dont get them developed that often..unless i happen to find a fabulous picture frame that NEEDS a recent photo..

ok so now that digital photos have come along, the newest fad is to download your pictures onto your computer and various websites: facebook, myspace, blogs, etc etc....

as you can guess, if i was slow at the whole picture developing thing. i am certainly behind at learning how to download photos to different websites..i mean i have done some, like facebook and myspace..but i have yet to take the time to learn how to put photos on my blog.

sometimes pictures are worth a thousand words..soooooooo I think i need to learn to add photos
:-)

thats all i got on this subject..

happy monday to all

paint brushes and dance shoes

2008-07-16T17:34:00.000-07:00

ok so im excited..today i have been thinking of all the things that i love to do..but that i dont make time to do. Things i am good at, and things i am not so good at. But regardless, i love to do them. Painting, reading, dancing, writing...i love to do all of these...all are different ways of being creative, ways of expressing something within me..i do like my job, dont get me wrong..and i love working out, i love hanging out with my friends..but the creative things, they give me a different type of outlet..a way to get out thoughts, passions, energy.

I painted back in middle school and college. I will say i am good. i have had people want to buy my paintings. However it has been a LONG time since i have picked up a paint brush. I really want to start painting again..and possibly try to sell some of the art. I found a cute restaurant that will let me hang my paintings up for sale on their walls. Soooo i started looking into art classes offered in raleigh..i need to refresh what i had learned back in the day. I love impressionist paintings. I love to use acrylic paint. They have a certain thickness that enables the painter to show texture . The brush strokes are visible in acrylic paintings and i love how that looks. The hardest thing for me is making the time to paint. My favorite piece of art i have done is of sailboats in a harbor. This i did my sophomore year of college during winter term..and it took a lot of work, a lot of perfecting..a lot of focused time was dedicated to this piece..how in the world can i make this kind of time to paint again?..my dad told me, you make time for what you love.

The other thing i looked into is dance classes. This i am not good at.. I mean i am athletic and i have rhythm but i am not flexible and i have NEVER danced before in my life. I have taken one hip hop class with ginny..it was fun, but i was not the best in the class! haha..but i loved it!! it was soooooooooo much fun.. The North Carolina Dance Institute offers a lot of great classes. Jazz, Modern, Hip Hop, Ballet.. They are pricey but its such a new and fun thing for me..plus its great exercise. As you can see i know nothing about dance..its just something that i enjoy.

However, i cannot do both of these because the budget does not allow. I guess ill have to make a decision soon enough and just go with it.

Ill let ya know how it turns out
what would you prefer, paint brushes or dance shoes?

there's a reason for it..

2008-07-03T08:28:00.000-07:00

Here is what I think..that when things dont go the way we planned or the way we were hoping, its because we have no clue!! i know i dont have a clue. This weekend for example..things didnt go the way i expected and I was a lil sad about it..however, i am so okay about it now.. i know that I am not in control of anything, the big or the small things.. Things didnt work out how i planned or expected but i know that there is a reason for that..God sees past today and tomorrow and on into eternity..he knows the whole story..and even though the weekend plans turned out different than i thought or hoped for, i know God has planned it for the best for him and his glory..and in that, it's the best for me.
God puts people in certain situations with certain people and at certain times for specific reasons that only he can see in advance.
And i am excited about this weekend now..i have a lot of fun plans and i will be hanging out with fun people that otherwise i wouldnt have seen..
tonight i am going to see a movie on the lawn at Koka Booth Amphitheatre..a small group of us is going..we are gonna load up our chairs and pack a cooler full of cold drinks and snacks..i'm gonna enjoy the weather, the movie, a cold mountain dew and prob some baked lays..then afterward enjoy the friends around me ...
Tomorrow is July 4th and my brother Josh's 21st bday!! Again a group of people are getting together and heading out to regency park..prob around 3 so we can get a good spot..lay out our blankets and then play cards or throw the football until the fireworks start..there will be plenty of time for relaxing and just catching up with friends...I know ill be tired after the fireworks...i have grown out of my night owl stage.AH.what happened?? haha
then comes Saturday..my aunts, uncles, cousins are all coming to my parents house to celebrate Graduations..my cousin kate graduated from UNCW and my cousin Macie graduated from Lake Norman highschool..i love my family..we will have a great time.. we'll do what we always do: hang around and chat, laugh a lot, eat a lot, and make sure to get in many hugs! haha..oh and there will be gifts involved this time..so fun
Saturday night will prob be a game night..have people over to my parents house, lots of food, play horse shoes, cards, get in the outdoor hot tub and just chill, maybe put in a movie..
Sunday is church, pool, small group..
AND sometime during the weekend we will celebrate Josh's bday!! sounds busy but we will def fit in it...and the funny thing is, Josh will probably want to make his own cake..delish!! i swear he could cook anything with no recipe, you name it..last night he made chicken pastry/chicken pot pie..it was so good..I asked Josh, "did you use a recipe?" .."no" he says..what in the world..i MUST have a recipe..i make some great banana bread i must say..but the list of things i cook is limited..HAHA..yall know that already though..and thanks for still loving me ;-)

So anyway, as i said again..God always puts us right where he wants us..and even if there wasnt fun stuff still going on this weekend, that wouldnt change a thing..God would still have ordained it, even if it didnt seem like an important thing..it still would have been for a reason..God will use the weekend and the events of the weekend and the people he puts in our lives every weekend and everyday for a reason..even if we have no idea that that moment or that conversation, or that random running into and old friend, or that song we hear on the radio...whatever it is..God will use it..but if there is one thing i learned..We have to look for it...God is moving and working in our lives and all around us..But are we sensitive to him, to his Spirit in our heart, to what he shows us through the seemingly insignifacant things in our lives, through the big and the small things..We must take our eyes off of ourselves and look through the eyes that God gives us , eyes that have a vision for eternity and for God's kingdom, the one that will last forever and conquer everything..
I cant wait until the day where it is no longer a daily decision/struggle to see things this way..til the day when i am there, in eternity with Him..

Hearing HIS voice!!

2008-06-24T10:40:00.000-07:00

You do not know when His voice will come to you, but whenever the realization of God comes, even in the faintest way imaginable, be determined to recklessly abandon yourself, surrendering everything to Him. It is only through abandonment of yourself and your circumstances that you will recognize Him. You will only recognize His voice more clearly through recklessness being willing to risk your all.

I want to recognize God's voice more clearly, and to be able to drown out all the other voices..there are so many: my own, parents, friends, media, satan..
I rejoice that i am able to hear from God and that He takes the time to speak to me:-)
thank you Jesus!

When my thoughts wander, where do they go..

2008-06-14T09:24:00.000-07:00

Saturday June 14th.

I love the weekends. I love 'me' time. Time where i dont have to do anything. I can listen to David Crowder. Sing out loud while cleaning my house and/or baking banana bread..oh and one loaf always has chocolate chips. I love my dogs, jack and cody, bringing the ball to me every 30 min.
I love the sunshine and being able to see it out the windows, i cant see outside from my office at work. I love being able to go to the pool, for a walk, being able to read a book, write in my journal.
I love being able to watch a chic flick and do laundry. I love that i can quiet my mind. I dont think I am very good at this, but I do a better job of it on a lazy day...today is Saturday and I have the house all to myself. My mind is quiet. I wish I could do this more often and have alone time, quality time with God. I hate that I passively use the business of life as an excuse..I do not do it on purpose..i just let it happen. That is not being a soldier of the Lord. I will get conquered everyday living passively that way. God calls us to be purposeful. Going to work, watching TV, working out, shopping..those things are easily done while lacking purpose. But it doesnt have to be that way. We can do all these things for God and his glory. God is to be first on our priority list..not out of duty but out of a pure and honest response to the love we have for Jesus our Savior. We are to make disciples as we go..not every now and then while we are on our way..but instead 'while we are going' Our main purpose is to love and glorify God and to point others to him and share his love..This is a constant in our lives while the mundane details of life are things we must do as we pursue our purpose and our Savior.

I love how God gives us passions, creativity, song lyrics, poems, THE BIBLE, hymns, psalms, pens to write and computers to type our thoughts. I love that HE gives us prayer. He gives us the birds, the trees, the ocean, the sand, he gives us beautiful radiant flowers..I love how he gives us the sound and smell of rain. I love the shade the from the trees.. God is such a detailed God..He is a perfect God and a perfect maker of the whole Earth and beyond! Our culture has become so fast paced that we have covered up God's creation. We are so busy that we dont get time to see past the hussle ans see what God has given us to enjoy while we are passing through..while we are just visiting here on Earth, until..we can be forever with Him.

I dont like that i miss out on God a lot of times! I can honestly say i think about God almost all day..BUT the times that i dont, the times that i lose sight of him and eternity, are maybe some of the most vital times during my day..times that I need him to keep me from losing my temper, times when i need him to sustain me, to give me hope, to refocus my thoughts, to give me compassion when it doesnt come naturally, to remind me to do all things for him, times when i just need to stop and enjoy God and not 'do'. I miss God everyday. I often think about how i wouldnt mind if Jesus came back today..I actually hope he comes back soon. I dont want to live to be old. I know that sounds morbid. but honestly, why would i want to live here one more day when that day is keeping me from an eternity with my Father..with the I AM. Dont get me wrong, I love my life. I want to get married and have kids, grandkids. There are many places I would like to travel and explore. And yes of course, there are many souls to save. Part of me feels selfish for being excited for Jesus to come back..because there many who do not know HIM as their Savior. but when its all said and done, its fine to be ready and excited for Jesus to come back..because it will be done in the fullness of time..it will be done in His perfect timing. and that i do not have to worry about. But i do hope its soon. Many times when i am sad or have had a hard day, i just want God to hug me, to hold me. IT relaxes me and calms me and gives me hope when i think about this. i know He is my refuge hear on earth and he still holds me in his hands. But i like to imagine this is a tangible thing.. how awesome to sit in the lap of our Father! One day this will happen and I cant wait for this day.

When I quiet my mind and i forget about what i want to do today, what i need to do today. I find that this is where my mind and thoughts go..this is where my heart lies. I want to go home. This will be a glorious day. My prayer is that until then, I please my Father and that I listen to his whispers, i feel his tugs on my heart, and i respond to His Spirit within me..because I know in this, his will will be done and others will come to know him!

I love you Jesus!

please excuse the grammar and/or spelling errors

The Rodeo..and other adventures in Raleigh

2008-06-12T12:12:00.000-07:00

OK so I have been in Raleigh since the 9th grade, and I was in Cary before that, since i was 5. I love Raleigh..I always have. I love that it is a city with enough to do, but not as much traffice as NYC, ATL, Charlotte.. As many of you know, traffic brings out the worst in me. I am not proud of it. um but thats life..and i work on it..haha. I love Raleigh because its close to the BEACH!! and close to the mountains. If gas was free I would drive to the beach every weekend..its so relaxing there..and its really very spiritual!! I love how God has created so many things, sites for us to enjoy. Well those things are nice about Raleigh, but as far as Raleigh itself goes, I found that I have run out of stuff to do...I mean how many times can you go bowling, play ski ball at Frankies, go to the Movies, go to the Mall, or the gym, or go walk around the lake..well i guess you could do these forever..BUT..it actually turns out there are more fun things to do in Raleigh but i just havent been looking..
Well this week I am trying new things...and so far its been great!!!
Tuesday night I went to the Rodeo. I love love loved it!! What a new fun experience..its so different from anything I'm used to, and its out of my comfort zone. not in bad way though..haha
When the night kicked off, horses were riding around the arena in a formation. the girls riding the horses were holding flags. One was the NC flag. Then a man said a prayer. After that some hype music came on and a horse galloped into the arena more speedily than the others..this girl was carrying the American flag..then everyone there said the Pledge of Alleigance to the Flag and we then sang the National Anthem..I loved the sense of patriotism and the acknowledgement of God that this event had. All the bull riders were announced and the bull riding began!! WOW i loved it..the youngest bull rider was 17..yikes..
During intermission were barrel races..the girls took turns racing on a horse around the course and making the sharpest turns possible around the barrels without knocking them over...I thnk the fastest time was 17.5 seconds..better than i could do..
well thats about it. we left early bc the mosquitos were getting us.next time ill bring bug spray:-)

Tonight Patrick and I are taking his parents to a movie on the Lawn...never done this before..I know to bring bug spray now..haha. Koka Booth Amphitheatre does this on thurs nights in the summer. Tonight is The Bee Movie..i think is will be funny..we shall see. But before the movie we are going to Hard Times Cafe!!! LOVE IT..it has the best frito pie...what is that you say..its chili with fritos and the mixins..cheese, sour creme, diced tomatoes, any or all of those. There are 4 kinds of chili to choose from: Texas, Cincinatti, Vegetarian, and Terilinqua. I love the Texas.. Patrick gets Terilinqua or Cincinatti..I recommend you try this place out..they also have burgers, fries, chicken sandwhiches, salads..but go for the Chili..It is on Glenwood..downtown.

So thats 2 new things in raleigh this week..hopefully Ill try some more things next week. But actually it might have to wait til July..June is hectic...crazy how that happens..but it will give me time to research and find a new adventure to take on...
let me know if you have ideas!

Lifetime Friendships (YaYa Pants)

2008-06-11T15:17:00.000-07:00

These are truly a gift from the Lord!! I believe God knows we need these and HE wants us to have these as we fullfill our purpose on this earth until we get to be with him, our best friend.
Dont get me wrong. Not all the friendships are for a lifetime. Some are only for a season, and these are great too. Im not dissing them at all..

I am so blessed to have several friendships that i know will be for a lifetime!! God gives us these to experience many things with..to laugh with, cry with, do nothing with, enjoy the uniqueness of one another, debate with, confide in, pray for and with, lay out with, eat ice cream with, sit in silence with, ...He gives us friends to confront us in love when needed, to teach us more about himself, to frolic on the beach, eat seafood with on the sound, take road trips with, make mix cds with, read magazines with and buy make up with (well not for the guys)
But truly when you look past all the superficial things and surfaced things, you know you have found a true friend when NO matter WHAT, that friend will be there with you..to celebrate something wonderful and exciting, to sit and hold you during a hard time or trial in your life..and most importantly, during any season of life..encourage you to see God, hear God, and grow closer to God.

But on a lighter note..i hope to continue doing fun and new things with the friends God has blessed me with! Already i have begun to travel the world with these friends..Tay and I went on a 4th of July cruise back in the day..we experienced a monsoon on a small boat while doing the conga line and we saw the mayan ruins....i cant even remember the islands we went to but i do remember they were amazing. Ginny and I spent 10 days in St John! Um this place has the most beautiful beaches i have seen..being the only person on a private beach is amazing..oh and we got to see Kenny Chesneys beach house..we went parasailing for free, the catch was that it was the boat driver's last time to take someone up before he could get certified, we were a lil nervous. We went snorkeling, the small fish liked to get under your body, right under your stomach, and swim with you, like you were their shade or something..haha

But it doesnt take traveling the world to enjoy new times with friends..every stage of life is a new time..even if its in the same city you've always lived in, the same beach house you always visit, the same coffee house you always meet at to sit, sip, chat and catch up. I hope to enjoy the simple things in life with my friends forever. The small things that God gives us and show us. Like the blooming magnolia trees, the tide, the smell of babies, a touching word from a past love one, that one yellow tank top (G you know what i mean) and a peek at a rainbow through the clouds.
.. My friends and I always say we will keep in touch and have reunions forever. We are on a good role so far..but i really really know life gets busy and can get in the way..it takes going out of your way to make a phone call sometimes, or buckling down and making the plans for a fun reunion trip..life can separate friends and they can live on opposite coasts ;-) but they can still be the best of friends..

I was inspired to write about my friends today, and how I desire to keep these intimate friendships forever...I was eating lunch at Moes..then 5 ladies walked in the door at sat at the table right next to mine..they had to be at least 60. They were celebrating Debbie's bday ( I saw the name on the card) I like to think they have been lifetime friends :-) It doesnt take anything extravagant to get together to celebrate a bday...just lunch at Moes...I'd like to do that one day with my girls .maybe when we are 60..

That's Who I AM

2008-05-02T11:04:00.000-07:00

Who I am
If I live to be a hundred
And never see the seven wonders
Thatll be alright
If I dont make it to the big leagues
If I never win a grammy
Im gonna be just finecause
I know exactly who I am

I am rosemarys granddaughter
The spitting image of my father
And when the day is done
My mommas still my biggest fan
Sometimes Im clueless and Im clumsy
But Ive got friends that love me
And they know just where I stand
Its all a part of meAnd thats who I am

So when I make a big mistake
When I fall flat on my face
I know Ill be alright
Should my tender heart be broken
I will cry those teardrops knowin
I will be just finecause nothin changes who I am

I am rosemarys granddaughter
The spitting image of my father
And when the day is done
My mommas still my biggest fan
Sometimes Im clueless and Im clumsy
But Ive got friends that love me
And they know just where I stand
Its all a part of me
And thats who I am

Im a saint and Im a sinner
Im a loser, Im a winner
Im steady and unstable
Im young but I am able

I am rosemarys granddaughter
The spitting image of my father
And when the day is done
My mommas still my biggest fan
Sometimes Im clueless and Im clumsy
But Ive got friends that love me
And they know where I stand
Its all a part of meAnd thats who I am

-Jessica Andrews-

remind me

2008-05-02T08:00:00.001-07:00

"Father help me wait for my full reward, remind that its not here....my sould cannot rest here.."
-Shelly Moore Band-

This world is good because God created in and said it was good. We are his people. We are sinners but he loves us anyway..not because of anything we do, but because HE is God and his love is unconditional. We can never earn salvation. We have to know him, strive to know him, and Love Him with all our heart, mind, and soul. But even in this we do not belong here. We will be complete in Heaven..with our Savior

This is so amazing and such an incredible gift!! we in no way, shape, or form deserve this. and all we have to do is accept it. This world is full of the results of our sin. We are sinful. We disobey God. We hurt others with our words, and others are hurt also with violence. We cheat on our spouses, we hurt our children, we have unrealistic selfish expectations of others, we are quick to anger and slow to forgive. ("A hot tempered man stirs up dissension, but a patient man calms a quarrel." Proverbs 15:18) We are stubborn, greedy, never satisified with what we have. we get jealous, we are not pure, we dont love the way God loves. All these things and more are what fill our lives..our minds..our hearts.. but Jesus blood can cover this, He can begin to erase these things and replace them with his truths, his words, his hope, his love, his forgiveness, his humility. Only by asking him and seeking him for help will this be possible. The scripture is full of examples our sin and impurites..but it is also full of how merciful and gracious our Father and Savior in Heaven is. God never leaves us without hope..He is our hope.

Hope..it is important that we have the hope God gives us. Hope for the salvation of others. Hope in our friends and companions. Hope that God can heal brokeness, hope that God can change our wicked heart, hope that God can reveal the depths of our heart that we dont even know about or see. Hope that God will help us understand..understand Him, his Truth, others, feelings, thoughts, undertsand his love, his hope, understand that sometimes we wont understand but in those cases we are called to have faith in HIM..not in what he has done, or what he will do for us .but soley in HIM and who HE is...He is I AM. That is such a powerful statement i pray God lets me grasp the depths of that statement and never take for granted the fact that He allows me to have a relationship with the I AM.

I read this last night from Psalms.it gives me hope..and a right perspective on life and the problems that i think are so hard or impossible to change or fix..

PSALM 25:1-7
"To you, O Lord, I lift up my soul; in you i trust, O my God. Do not let me be put to shame, nor let my enemies triumph over me. No one whose hope is in you will ever be put to shame, but they will be put to shame who are treacherous without excuse.

Show me your ways, O Lord, teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. Remember, O Lord, your great mercy and love, for they are from of old. Remember not the sins of my outh and my rebellious ways; according to your love remember me, for you are good, O Lord."

Today my hope is in Jesus all day long. And when i wake up tomorrow i will say the same thing, and on and on...

haha.. HAHA..

2008-04-30T12:12:00.000-07:00

PS i noticed i use the term 'haha' or 'HAHA' toooooooooo much
i mean i put it after things that arent even funny
this is a habit i will try to break..haha ;-)

catching up....

2008-04-30T10:53:00.000-07:00

Its been forever since ive blogged..i guess ive enjoyed reading some adventures and thoughts on my friends blogs that i thought..hey i want to start again! haha

sooooooooooooo a lot has happened since the last time..
basically..i have bought my 3rd townhome..the others are sold..haha..this one is my fav!! its a brand new 3 bed 2 bath off glenwood..close to raleigh grande and brier creek.and FRANKIE's..haha..love to go and play ski balll there..

also..this is the place patrick and i will be living when we get married..YES you heard right..i am engaged..he proposed at my favorite place..topsail island..on the pier at sunset..such a romantic night full of great converstation..delicious scallops..God's perfect timing..and an amazing sunset, amazing ring.and the perfect man for me! i love patrick and cant wait to be his wife!!! as he puts it..God has such an amazing journey for us together..:-)

so about the wedding!! Ginny is helping me plan..yes she loves planning and is great at it! what would i do without her..haha..she need to come back and visit soon. but she is busy traveling with work!! haha.

this year a lot has happend but all have shown me and taught me more about the truth of who Jesus is..
i have been sick a lot..once it was actually scary..i have gotten engaged..i coach a U13 girls soccer team which i loveeeeeee..if it paid morei would do that full time..hah..and i have gotten knee surgery..oh and i will be an aunt soon as well..my brother's son..the babies name will be trey. he will be adorable:-) i cant wait to meet him! i will also have 3 other nephews and another niece..all from patricks brothers :-)

well i just got back from nyc with my mom. we went there as a birthday trip!! SO FUN..we walked everywhere..shopped..saw WICKED..ate..haha..but i wont fly american airlines again!

sorry this is sooooooo random.i am trying to hit all the important parts..haha

oh i went on a mission trip in july 07..AMAZING!! the kids there were so sweet!

but mostly..i miss my closest girl friends!!! ginny is in charlotte, thank goodness she love coming to raleigh. taylor is in kansas city! i have gone to visit twice. both times were so fun!! kristen lives in seattle and the other kristin lives in Kentucky! then there is lauren (klein) who lives in atl..but she got to come stay with me a couple weeks ago..woowoo

soon, at the end of may..me and all the girls i lived with at elon are having a reunion in atl at klein's house!! woowoo..we are going to chatuea elan..check out the website..amazing..then that night we will go to her fav mexican place..the rest of the weekend will be catching up, shopping and who knows..

alright..more later
happy hump day

Timing..

2006-06-23T09:51:00.000-07:00

His perfect timing!! It blows my mind. All i can say is that right now, this time in my life is great. Blessed. that is a good word to describe it. I don't deserve any of what I have been given, but I know that God blesses us because He loves us. And He wants us to embrace the time we have hear and enjoy life in abundance, expecting great things..things that we can't even imagine..because that is who He is ( well only part of who He is) He is a God who I cannot begin to fathom or understand because the human mind is finite and out Creator is infinite!!

I have the greatest friends..girls and guys!! I can count on them for anything: a laugh, a hug, a shoulder to cry on and an ear to listen, advice when i need it, encouragement, love.. i could go on and on...some awesome people who love the Lord and know how to have a good time bringing glory to his Name.

Do you ever wonder why God brings certain people into your life?? I do..I have some friends who were a huge part of my life.. i may not talk to them anymore but they were a huge part of my life at one point..God had a plan there i know it. And i have friends today that have been so dear to me for years and we are still as close as ever even though we live miles and states apart. If there is one thing i've learned, it is that the Holy Spirit creates a fellowship and an intimacy between friends that is so necessary to this life we live hear on earth..I am thankful for the intimacy i share with my friends. God keeps bringing new people into my life and I do wonder..i wonder what He has in store for these friendships..how we will be there for each other and who we will become to one another..Have you ever met someone and they just shine with his love..there is a peace a calmness a joy a serenity..a smile that wont go away..i know His hand is in control here and I dont want my hands in any of it.. i have learned that when i try to control things, all it does is taint a situation that I need to allow God to make perfect in his perfect timing and his perfect will for my life. For all my friends new and old.. I love you all!! and you are in my prayers...

Back to timing..I am enjoying this time in my life..24..a good number..and no i dont think 25 is old so i am not scared to go there..haha..some of my best friends are 25..does that make you more wise..haha..whatever..well I am just living in the here and now, knowing that i am not promised another day. I am soaking up the joys that God is continually filling me with..his promises are real and true..he is merciful..his grace is so undeserved..I am just waiting for him to move me along during this life He has blessed me with..allowing me new breath each morning to sing praises to his Holy Name..

PS if you havent heard Shelly Moore Band..then you must!!

sweetly broken..

2006-06-03T14:21:00.000-07:00

To the cross I look, to the cross I cling
Of its suffering I do drink
Of its work I do sing
For on it my Savior both bruised and crushed
Showed that God is love
And God is just

At the cross You beckon me
You draw me gently to my knees,
and I am
Lost for words, so lost in love,
I’m sweetly broken, wholly surrendered

What a priceless gift, undeserved life
Have I been given
Through Christ crucified

You’ve called me out of death
You’ve called me into life
And I was under Your wrath
Now through the cross I’m reconciled

In awe of the cross I must confess
How wondrous Your redeeming love and
How great is Your faithfulness

SWEETLY BROKEN ~ Jeremy Riddle
i couldnt say it better..

you're up...

2006-05-18T06:17:00.000-07:00

..and then you're down...
Man if there is one thing i am learning, it is that this life is going to be an ongoing process of learning more and more of how unperfect (if that is a word) I am, how underserved is His grace and mercy..and sanctification is such an awesome work that God does in us..but MAN it is hard and it makes me realize that until i die i will be learning more and more about my sinful heart and keep seeing more and more places in my life where God is redeeming me ..He says that even our rightousness is as filthy rags...but that is what is so wonderful about God's agape (unconditional love) a love that surpasses all understanding..i mean how many times do we look at God straight in the face and tell him that we choose something else for that moment ..we choose a temporary fulfillment, we choose ourselves, we choose pride, we choose laziness..and we do this knowing that God's precious one and only Son Jesus Christ suffered the most painful death..and He did this knowing we would curse his Name and sin against him..Shane and Shane put's it perfectly
"should You give me one more breath to curse Your name oh God? why allow me one more
thought to delight in me? do i have the right to walk a step upon Your grace? while i call
upon myself, should You give me life?"
this sounds like something horrible has happened..but as God has shown me that I can walk in victory, and not live a life of those outward sins (drinking, gossiping, etc, etc) He is now showing me that it is in actuallity the intangible sins that are even more important because these are the ones that determine who we are..they are our character..the outward, the picture of our life is formed and created by the inward,, who we are on the inside..that is where it all begins..in the places no one can see..the places in our heart that only God knows about..He shows us our pride, our selfishness, our laziness, our insecurities, our fears, our bitterness, our anger..all of these may be hidden in the secret places of our hearts..we may have burried them so deep and only God can surface these and allow us to give them up to him..allowing him to continually refine and redeem us from our sinful nature..molding us to a more beautiful picture of who He would have us be..I want so badly to be teachable, moldable, so i can become that woman of God he has planned for me to be..and He tells us that we are created for his workmanship and that He will finish the work He has started in us..all of this I know..but faith is tricky..we can have faith, our finite human minds may believe, but when it comes down to it, do we really act on that faith, do we live out that faith??
"tell me reveal to me, how can i be a young (wo)man keeping my way pure by living by your Word..for i seek you Lord with all my heart. i'm amazed, i will praise, i will pray, i'm amazed, i will praise, i will praise...for tonight I'll delight. i will not neglect your Word. i'm amazed. hold me, don't let me stray, hear my cry.. the Word is hidden in my heart, within my heart. cover me that i might live and i won't sin against you my Lord. hear i am. i believe in life abundantly. i hope in You"
that is my prayer..it's a daily battle between the spirit and the flesh..how weak is the flesh?!?! there is so much more i have to learn! but it's exciting to see this journey God has taken me on..and it is exciting to think about where this road will lead and all the things He will teach me on the way..this life is a pattern..it's a constant cleansing of the heart that takes place through trials in our lives, our minds..and then our leaning on God who gives us the strength to conquer these obstacles and milestones in our lives..as we then come out victorious..we live in that victory!! the same power that raised Jesus on the 3rd day and defeated death is the same power alive in us!! don't forget this ..be encouraged cuz we have already won!!
love yall
feel free to leave me your thoughts..i would love some insight

east asia on my mind..

2006-04-26T07:21:00.000-07:00

well i must say that yesterday's events were kinda strange...
i will be brief cuz i can tend to get wordy when telling stories or describing how things turn out..such as all that when on yesterday..well to start, i was supposed to go to nashville to run the country music marathon with my favoritest mint hillian (but she really is a raleigh-ite at heart)..turns out neither of us are going now (keep her friend laura in your prayers) and i am kinda relieved to be staying home this weekend..nashville is an awesome city but the drive is LONG, i would be spending more money, and i would start off next week being exhuasted and once again feeling like i had no relaxation! I am finding that lil R&R is necessary in my old age of 24..haahaa

so now i will be goin to the southern women's show with lauren sanders...yes i love this girl..we are writing a book by the way (i will discuss them some other time, dont let me forget)
and sunday is kyle's bday!! i think i will make him that banana bread he is drooling for..haha..that is if he washes my car ;-) and of course i will go to Church sunday morning and to my leadership class that night..will prob end up at the hood's house once again..i mean seriously..

WELL last but not least, let's go back about two months ago when chad mentioned a mission trip to east asia that he thought i should go on..supposedly it was gonna be in SEPTEMBER '06..well my roommie is out of town so last night i sent out a txt msg looking for something to do..yes i am a loser..haha...well lauren told me that she was goin to the orientation meeting for the east asia trip, did i want to go? well i figured, i had thought about this trip before (and was praying about it, but havent been so much recently..) so why not go check it out, i had nothing else to do..(ps usually my nights are busy without a free second) so i went and turns out the trip is july 16-27, whoa a lot sooner that i expected. so i am not prepared for this..i dont want to jump into a trip that God hasnt planned for me..not to mention the trip costs $$$$..but anyway, i had no idea about the meeting and then it just fell into my lap..kinda cool..

AHHHHH so much for being brief..sorry blog world...ginny you are used to my ramblings via our daily emails..haha

mucho amor

testing testing

2006-04-20T11:38:00.000-07:00

HELLO!
Yes i have given into this world of the bloggers. I figure that i read some of my friends blogs and I enjoy journaling, so hey, why not create my own blog. Plus I type faster than I write and i is a widely known fact that i have the handwriting like that of a kindergarten boy. If there were a font of my handwriting then that would be the name "Kindergarten Boy" It is sad..I know! Some people say it has to do with the fact that i am left handed and a math person...hmmm..
well there is no point to this blog except i had to make an entry to preview my page..i hope it works...?!?!!?
lataaaaaa